fartgallery:

i moved out 4 years ago and the novelty of living on my own is still goin strong, like ill be chillin on the couch in my underwear eating cheese balls and be like “hell yea this is sweet i dont miss high school or home at all”

fuckyeahhistorycrushes:

starberryboos:

"ey touch my bongos"

i am still laughing at this i am so sorry
i just rly want to share it with you all
its important history

xybutt:

tibets:

tibets:

here is a corner of a room that has a penis and balls

i have truly posted some things online

to the window
to the walls
to the corner dick and balls

Me: *out for dinner with my dad because we were too lazy to cook*
Random Old Lady: *comes up out of no where with the most judgmental look ever* (will also be refereed to as 'ROL')
ROL: Isn't he a little old for you?
Me: Well, considering he's my Dad, I'd say that your a judgmental hag.
Dad: *chokes into his drink*
ROL: You should respect your elders.
Me: You should respect your youth, we're the ones who'll decide on whether or not to pull your cord in like, what? Five weeks?
Dad: *chokes on his drink again*
ROL: *storms off*
Dad: *looks at me with a disapproving look*
Me: What?
Dad: Come on, you and I both know it will be three weeks.

bromar:

*goes to england*

me: excuse me, what time is it?

brit: time wots that m8?

*big ben chimes*

everyone starts to count the bongs on their fingers*

brit: OI IT’S 7 BONG

how is my favorite lamp doing yes that u Lauren

diddly doo darn great i am great

REBLOG IF YOU WOULD LIKE SOME ANONS IN YOUR INBOX

blackout-escapist:

bagmilk:

*concerned white parent voice* sweetie don’t write on yourself you can get ink poisoning

image

^back to the present^
©